Ever been too scared to ask for your money back? Sounds like that time when the school bully stole your lunch money and it just didn't seem worth a chocolate milk and some overcooked corn to tap some kid on the shoulder and say "hey, could ya give it back, I'm hungry?"
No, this is the plumber update. A little guy and his little troll son who basically pissed me off last week have grown in stature to full fledged criminal trolls, complete with rocks to smash windows and clubs to smash skulls clutched in their knobbly fingers.
When they cashed my check after having done nothing but blown the lid off my upstairs toilet and left the broken one....broken.....I drove to Max's place of business to do just that, say "hey, could ya give it back." But upon arrival at the listed address, all I saw, sandwiched between all the other perfectly neat and respectable homes and businesses on the street, was a broken down, gutted trailer guarded by a pair of pit bulls mixed with Siberian bear. In other words, Max's plumbing service did not, and does not, in fact, exist.
A little flutter of cold fear spread through my once cynical mind. This was no longer an annoying story about some jackass who cashed a check. A total stranger had stood in my house, one week ago today, and he certainly wasn't a plumber.
I did what my single mother, previous victim of home invasion, brain signaled, and drove, without passing "GO," to the Harker Heights Police Station, where I learned that "Max" and his criminal ways is known well to those in uniform.
First question from the kind officer was, "do you have an alarm system?"
I heard the rest, about reinforcing my front door lock with the proper length three inch screws to avoid my door being kicked down (it would take three kicks now, rather than one) and holding my keys in an offensively poking device-like manner every time I left the house, clearing every room before I settle in when I return from buying milk, and taking pictures of all my valuables on my cell phone as soon as possible, but it was through a fog of WTF.
Did I say I have a freak magnet? Refer to previous posts. I do. By God, I do! Stick with me folks, and your life, too, can become complicated by an empty toilet tank.
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